Romance and Me: The Friends to Lovers Trope

Filed in Romance and Me , The Latin Lover Posted on September 7, 2011 @ 2:00 pm 8 comments

There are several tropes which feature frequently in romance novels: be it a a very rich but rude or unattainable hero (can anyone say modern Mr. Darcy?), love triangles, a tortured brooding historical hero, or a rake seducing his sworn enemy’s younger sister to exact revenge on his nemesis, we all have encountered them. But there is one trope which is closer to my heart than others and it is the friends to lovers plot (and I especially love the brother’s friend falling for the little sister kind of friends-to-lovers plot).

My fascination with this trope isn’t limited to novels only, I like it just as much in movies and series (tell me honestly: weren’t Chandler and Monica the cutest couple of Friends? and if I had my say on with whom Rachel should have ended up with I would have picked Joey without a doubt, loved how his love brought out a more mature and thourghtful side of him, but anyway, let’s get back to our topic).

There is something I find extremely heartwarming about the fact that the relationship of two people who have known each other for some time, who have been there for each other for years gradually or unexpectedly evolves into something more. I guess I like the “friends to lovers love” because in their case their love isn’t based on a shallow and sudden physical attraction but is due to knowing the little tidbits of the other person, knowing those unique traits which make them special and dear.

A couple where the man and woman were  friends first have all these inner jokes, they are comfortable around each other, and they get the other. They know different facets of the other and love the whole package. I guess my main point is that there is no greater testament and proof of love than a friends-to-lovers relationship. Because that other person already knew you and decided that they loved you just the way you are and chose to be with you. And isn’t that the dream? 🙂
I’m always on the lookout for great friends-to-lovers romances, so if you know of any, please let me know.
Last week Fiction Vixen mentioned a great Goodreads list compiling tons of friends-to-lovers themed novels, so if you are on the lookout for one, browse this list or this one.
Are you a fan of the friends-to-lovers plotline?

Do you have any great friends-to-lovers books to recommend?

About Stella


Stella is a proud bookaholic and a self-taught multilinguist in training. Besides reading, her other great passions are travelling and baking. When she is not globetrotting she lives in sunny Budapest, where she loves to spend her free time preparing (and feasting on) delicious cookies or devouring equally yummy books. Her favourite genres are urban fantasy and romance and she couldn’t live without her daily dose of sunshine. Besides being the Latin Lover on BLI Stella also blogs about books and a bookish life on Ex Libris.

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8 Comments

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  • Sullivan McPig September 7, 2011 at 2:13 pm

    Did you notice how even long before Chandler and Monica became an item, Chandler always had Monica's back? The two of them and Joey made Friends for me.

    That being said: the friends to lovers trope usually doesn't work for me in books, but what I hate even more is lovers who break up and after years apart hook up again. Must be because I never break up with people unless there's a more than good reason to do so. I'm a loyal piggy, but when people go to far there's no way back.

  • Estella September 7, 2011 at 3:06 pm

    Friends to lovers is one of my favorite tropes.

  • Sheree September 7, 2011 at 4:33 pm

    Friends-to-lovers works great in books but I generally advise against it in real life because if the relationship doesn't work out, not only does one lose a love but a friend as well.

  • LSUReader September 7, 2011 at 5:38 pm

    I LOVE this trope, for a lot of the reasons you mention. Two of Julia Quinn’s Bridgerton books represent it perfectly: When He was Wicked and Romancing Mr. Bridgerton. A couple of the Bride Quartet novels by Nora Roberts successfully featured friends to lovers couples, as well.

    Some recent reads I’d recommend are Just One of the Guys (Kristan Higgins,) The Pursuit of Pleasure (Elizabeth Essex,) The Best of Friends (Susan Mallery,)and Sinful Surrender (Beverly Kendall.) I’m looking forward to Lydia Dare’s Never Been Bit, which features friends Alec and Sorcha as the hero and heroine.

    Thanks for a fun column.

  • Hannah Kincade September 7, 2011 at 5:58 pm

    I am a fan. I'm also a victim of this particular trope. A very happy victim. 🙂

  • Stella (Ex Libris) September 8, 2011 at 5:29 am

    @Sullivan McPig: I agree, I watched Friends for the 3 of them 😀 They always made me laugh. But haven't noticed Chandler always having Monica's back even before they became a couple, seems I need to rewatch it ;-p

    @Estella: Great! 😀 Any favourite book you'd care to recommend?

    @Sheree: Yes, it can really ruin a friendship, but then who knows, maybe otherwise they'd miss out on the love of their life..

    @LSUReader: Thanks so much for the recommendations! I love Kristan Higgins and have her novels on my TBR pile, guess Just One of the Guys jumped to the top now ;-D lol

    @Hannah Kincade: Congrats Hannah! 😀 (I'm just as big a fan of the friends-to-lovers in real life as in fiction and movies :-D)

  • JessS September 10, 2011 at 12:48 am

    Yes! Aw, I love friends to lovers pretty much for all the reasons you've said.

  • Kaetrin September 10, 2011 at 5:54 am

    count me as another who enjoys the friends to lovers trope. The most recent one I read was by Inez Kelley but Sarah Mayberry and Kathleen Reilly do a really good job of this too, IMO.

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